Wednesday, April 10, 2013

What is Tough Mudder???


This is my recap from Tough Mudder 2012.  I am currently gearing up for Tough Mudder 2013...only 6 weeks left for training and fundraising.  If you don't know what it's about, read on and you'll know what we'll be doing.  Tough Mudder supports The Wounded Warrior Project.  Please consider making a donation.

https://register.toughmudder.com/fundraising/donate.aspx?event=13389&fundraiser=r5777945


I’m still grinning ear to ear from the most amazing experience, Tough Mudder 2012!!!   About eight months ago, Derek and I stumbled across The Tough Mudder and we agreed, "we should totally do this."   The details are blurry, but in no time, most likely under the influence of wine and endorphins, “No Use for a Name” was born.  We recruited our friends to join us, because nothing says friendship more than bear crawling in the mud under barbed wire.

We trained together and on our own.  Tough Mudder Boot Camp on a Sunday morning takes a special kind of dedication and commitment.  Eventually, foregoing drinks on Saturday night so that  I could have a good workout became a “thing.”  I also started to skip the unwinding-wine on Fridays after a long work week so that I could run faster and further on Saturday mornings.  Those runs were coveted and enjoyed for both the peace and quiet they offered and the confidence building they gave me.  Just the thought of running two miles last year would have made me cringe, but before you knew it, I was running six miles like it was nothing.  I started a pull-up program at home with the Iron Gym.  I took up Zumba…don’t laugh, it’s good for your agility!!!  I also faithfully made it to my Tuesday night Boot Camp and hit the gym when I could on my lunch break.

Each morning my phone would gently remind me how important these workouts were with the countdown app calling out how many days left until Tough Mudder.  I remember when it finally went under 100 days and suddenly there were only months, weeks, and soon just mere days before it was here.  The next thing I knew we were packed up and on the road with my fellow teammates. 
The strangest thing was that for days I had butterflies in my stomach, but suddenly they were gone as we arrived at Mt. Snow.  We piled out of the van, into the big bus and arrived at registration where we picked up our packets, pinned on our numbers, wrapped our wrists with colored bands and had our number written on our forehead in permanent marker…”so they could identify our bodies” we were later told by the MC.   Bladders emptied, bags checked, and the last pre-mudder photo taken.  All we had to do now was climb the entry Berlin Wall that read, “NO QUIT IN HERE”!!!  Woo Hoo!!! Aaron and Ben gave the ole “ten-finger” lift for me, Kelly and Tina and then they went over.  Last but not least Derek was up and over on his own.  I really wished I hadn’t just dropped straight down or wished that I had at least just bent my knees when I landed...my back was instantly killing me!!!  I didn’t say a word because how embarrassing would that have been!!!  “Hey, I know we haven’t even started the course, but my back is wrecked and I’m gonna sit this out!”  I decided to suck it up and stretch it out as best I could.

Soon the MC started amping us up for the course.  To say the he was amazing is an understatement!   His energy was contagious and soon we were chanting on cue, I say, “tough,” you say “mudder”… TOUGH MUDDER, TOUGH MUDDER, TOUGH MUDDER!!!  I say, “wounded,” you say “warrior”…WOUNED WARRIOR, WOUNED WARRIOR, WOUNED WARRIOR!!!   I say, “team,” you say, “pride”…TEAM PRIDE, TEAM PRIDE, TEAM PRIDE!!!   The next thing that I can remember is our National Anthem playing for us and we’re off up the first of many hills!  I had the advice of a veteran mudder in my head who told me too take it slow.  Dan wrote, “Don't get caught up in all the hype at the beginning. When the race starts, all that adrenaline is flowing and people are yelling and screaming and lots of people will charge out of the gates. You'll feel caught up in it. You'll feel pressure as people pass you. You'll feel all that energy and excitement making you want to charge too. Don't. It's a long race, and the toughest thing is reigning yourself in during those first few miles so you don't blow out all your energy. Pace yourself, remind yourself to go slow, and you'll be passing those people by miles 5 and 6. Once you get past mile 7 you start feeling drained. So save as much energy as you can for the second half of the course."
The Brave Heart Charge!!! 
It was hard to watch the charge and not go running off too, but I knew it was going to be a long day and I wanted to conserve my energy.  It really didn’t take long for my legs to start burning; it almost seemed as if all of my running and hill training had not even made a dent in what was going to be needed to complete all of what Tough Mudder was going to throw at us.  All that burning soon subsided and my heart sank with dread as we caught sight of what our first obstacle would be.


Arctic Enema!!!
As we rounded the corner and saw the sign, I will say I was disappointed that there wasn’t a line to wait in.  There was no dilly dallying to be had here, just a woman and a megaphone shouting for us to jump into the icy water at the foot of those 40 yard dumpsters.  It all happened pretty quickly.  I saw Tina & Kelly jump right in.  Then Aaron and I took the plunge.  It’s funny, in all of the photos I had browsed through with of all of the horrified faces I had seen, nothing and I mean nothing, can prepare you for what happens next.   You are up to you chest in icy water, your throat is closing up; it felt like someone pulled a zip-tie tightly around my airway.  Gasping for air, you’re in the water and the only way out is to dive under the water in order to pass the divider and swim to the other side – the only way out!  And without even thinking you are under water.  It is amazing what the mind and body will do without you even giving it the go ahead!  And I thought I was in pain when I first jumped in, I was wrong, it just doubled.  Just imagine the worst asthma attack you have ever had times a million!!!  The good news is that as soon as you climb out of this, you can feel your air way open back up and soon it’s as if it never happened.  And better yet, you are so freaking cold that the next obstacle is a welcome sight!

Death March!!!
The Death March greets you with snow guns.  Yup, you can run snow guns in the spring, it doesn’t need to be 32 degrees or below for them to work.  You’d think this would suck, marching with snow being blown at you, but honestly, those snow flakes falling on my skin felt like sweet butterfly kisses.  Yup, I was that cold from the Arctic Enema.  I can’t remember how long we hiked up the mountain for, but I know that I wasn’t cold for long.  It did seem like forever that we were marching.  You get to the point where you are looking forward to an obstacle.  Who would have thought that climbing on your hand and knees under barbed wire through mud and rocks would be a welcome break? 

Kiss of Mud!!!
“Well, Hello there my muddy darling,” I thought. And soon enough I’m bear crawling through the mud under barbed wired.  There may have been some electrified wires too, but I’m not quite sure.  The event called for three electrified obstacles and we figured this must have been one of them, since only two others stood out.  I kept my knees off the ground as long as I could, but towards the second half my feet would slip a bit and my knees would inevitably smack the ground.  I was OK with that, since it seemed like a good trade off for cutting my back open on barbed wire.   We are now officially very muddy and headed back up the mountain; let me tell you, they made good use of the terrain!!!

Devil’s Beard!!!
When we came around the corner and saw the bright orange cargo net lying on the ground we were psyched!  A nice easy obstacle was just what we needed to break up all of the hard work.  All we needed do was stick together and keep it up off the ground and we were through.  A lone red bandanna called out for help though and when Aaron went back to get it that proved to be twice as hard as making it through the first time.  I know Tina didn’t care if she got that thing back, but I kinda liked it since it made it easier to spot her!

Trench Warfare!!!
This was the first one that was going to test my mental grit.  I’m not a big fan of small spaces, let alone dark, small spaces that you must crawl through.  The huge rocks were a nice touch, my pelvis thanks, not really!  I loved crawling out of this one and into the mud a bit too much.  It might have been the loud music or just the feeling of accomplishment, but I kicked that mud up in the air…I am sorry to the mudders’ face that it landed on, oops: (

Berlin Walls #1!!!
A little more hiking and voila, Berlin Walls!!!  We used the same great strategy that we used to enter the course. A big “Thank You” goes out to Aaron and Ben, who gave each of us a ten-finger boost so we could reach the top of the wall.  And, even more thanks to thinking it through to the point that you hoisted Derek first.  A) He wasn’t left behind and B) He was on the other side to help lower us down.  It was the perfect Triple Threat of Muscle Power!!!

Hold Your Wood!!!
Here was another obstacle that wasn’t all that bad.  There were plenty of logs.  No one was stuck with a gigantic one unless that’s what they were going for.  We trekked down the slope and back up the other side.  The only thing that made me nervous was the feeling that someone who was up hill would wipe out and take me down with them.  Actually, I had that nagging fear on most of the descents, especially on the slippery ones.  It must have had something to do with that fact that years ago, I was taken out by an out of control skier.  Just couldn’t shake that feeling, eek.

Bale Bonds!!!
Have you ever seen those ridiculously huge round bales of hay?  Stack ‘em three high and you’ve got the Bale Bond obstacle.  I needed a little lift to get started up this one.  Damn you short legs!!!  Otherwise, it wasn’t so bad.  I pretty much just slid down the other side.

Electric Eel!!!
I was definitely feeling anxious about this one.  I think I had read one too many comments on the Tough Mudder page about people passing out from the shock and such.  Note to self: Don’t believe everything you read.  I am either super lucky or immune to being shocked.   I flew right through this thing.  It was like a slip and slide, well not exactly.  There were rocks and muddy water; warm muddy water.  OK, let’s not thing about why the water was warm.  My point is this Electric Eel wasn’t nearly as terrible as I had expected it to be.

Dong Dangler!!!
In past events I have seen this with an upper and lower rope that you walk across and it was named the Ball Shrinker…because of the colder water that you inevitably ended up in, of course!  It's not a good obstacle if you don't end up in cold water.  I think the Dong Dangler had the same idea in mind except that there was just the one rope which was had a rubber type covering on it.  It was placed nice and high and I would say that 90% of the Mudders needed help getting up there.  There was a bit of a wait for this one, but it moved quickly enough.  I nearly fell in trying to help Tina up…as much as I wanted to be a helper, most times “helping” was just staying out of the way, LOL.  After Tina, it was my turn.  Hands grip the rope first and then your feet come up to wrap around the rope as well…then it's time to hold on tight and pull yourself along.  I came up alongside one of the lifeguards in a kayak and asked if I was halfway.  "1/3 of the way," he said,  "Ugh," I replied.  My arms were starting to burn, but I kept pulling until I was pretty much in the water and just let my legs down and continued to pull until I could touch the bottom and walk out.  Soaking wet again, we head off for the next obstacle!

Cliffhanger!!!
I'm not sure this is even the next one to be honest…this is the order Tough Mudder listed on the event schedule, but I feel like the order is off somehow?  No matter, I'll just keep on rambling on.  This.One.Sucked!!! There, The Mudder is finally getting to me a bit!!!  The Cliffhanger was not hanging off a cliff, which I may have actually enjoyed.  No, this was pretty much scaling up a grassy cliff that was so vertical you didn't have to lean over very far to grab the slope!  My fear of slipping and rolling crazily out of control while knocking fellow mudders down like candle pins was definitely a concern of mine!!!  Not for Derek though, apparently he was just cruising right up the slope up right.  Ben said, "Derek, you're an animal!"  I guess the looks people were giving as he sauntered right past showed their amazement.   OK, so props to my husband for making it look so darn easy! 

Boa Constrictors!!!
As with the other tunnels, I was surprised that these definitely weren't as bad as I had imagined.  These are large, black conduits, submerged halfway in water that you have to crawl through.  The first one I practically swam through because there was also a slight decline.  The second one had the bottom cut out and you had to move upwards which was a little trickier.  At about the halfway point, I turned onto my side and pushed with my feet and pulled with my arms and I was out.  Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy, I think Tina would have called it.

Tired Yet!!!
Tired Yet, I saw the sign that read "tired yet" but honestly, I didn't realize it was an obstacle.  I just figured it was more of the Mudder's sense of humor, like with their other signs:  "If you did the Warrior Dash you'd be down by now."   "Remember you signed a death waiver," "Quit whining and start running"…well you get the idea.  So whatever this one was, I'm pretty sure I have no idea except that it led to my most dreaded obstacle.   Heights and jumping off a perfectly good platform, eek!!!

Walk the Plank!!!
Knots filled my stomach, lots of them.  Here was another obstacle that I would've loved there to be a wait for, but you know Murphy and his law.  Not gonna happen.  And so much for a pep talk from my husband, I was looking around frantically for him, poked my head around the side of the Plank thing-a-mo-bob and saw him swimming into shore.  I also saw a girl walk past me, all dry.  She wasn't skipping this one because of safety reasons; like not being able to swim.  I saw her climb down from the platform because she had second thoughts.   Gulp.  Up I went; hand over hand on the rope & up the ramp.  I could barely make it onto the platform because there were a few more mudders hemming and hawing about jumping.   Somehow or another I ended up in front of them.  I stepped forward.  I stepped back.  The sweet girl staffing the obstacle said, "C'mon, you can do it, just jump."  The next thing I knew I was in the water, going down and down, was I gonna hit the bottom?  Was I going to be able to kick myself back up to the surface?  Gasp. Air. Sunlight.  I made it, now just a about 12 feet or so to swim and I'm out.   Can I just say, that as a kid, I used to jump of the pier at Grape Island over and over and over again and it was probably twice as high as Walk the Plank.  Courage sure does dwindle as you age : (

Underwater Tunnels!!!
I'm not sure if I would call these "underwater tunnels".  It was more like logs over water that you had to go under, lol.  The water was muddy - surprise!  I kept to the left hand side where there seemed to be more room between the logs and the water.  I was able to almost hug the log as I moved under it, so my face never went under water.  I think that was a real eye saver!  Lots of muddy faces, lots of dirt in eyes, I was glad not to be one of them!

Glacier!!!
I was so not happy to see the Glacier and I'll tell you why…because just past it was The Funky Monkey, the one obstacle that I had been looking forward to.  It was already breaking my heart that it was towards the last quarter of the course, but now I was also going to have numb hands.  Well played, Tough Mudder, well played!!!   Whatever, NO QUIT IN HERE, I think I read that somewhere along the course.   Up the Glacier I went.  Across the Glacier I went.  And down the Glacier I went.  My hands were fah- REE- zing!!!!!   I pulled the old "Super Star" move and tucked them up under my arms and a kept on moving!

Funky Monkey!!!

Ole Murphy struck again…no wait for this obstacle.  No time to warm up.  Just time enough to listen to one staff person tell us that she had already seen about three broken ankles on women who fell.  She continued to explain that the water was not very deep below the first few rungs.   "If you feel yourself falling, remember to tuck.  You don't want to be in a cast all summer, do you?" she asked.  I was listening and freakin' out.  I was also still trying to figure out if I wanted to wear my gloves or not.  Gloves or no gloves?  "Plop!" Did I just see Aaron fall in?  No gloves, yup, definitely no gloves.  "Splash!"  Derek, Derek fell in?  WTF?  I remember turning to Tina and saying, "I think that lady is f#*@ing with us!!!"  "She is in my head!!!"  During all of this Ben made it across and was shouting that once you get past the first few it's fine…or something to that effect.   There may have been a "nod" too, like "go for it!"  Who knows?  We did train together on Sunday mornings.  He had seen me on the monkey bars quite a few times.  I was drying my hands by rubbing them in circles on the plywood face of the obstacle and the next  thing I know I was saying, “excuse me,” to someone who hadn't quite made up his mind.  I was on The Funky Monkey!!!!  Just like at Lighthouse Fitness, I went one rung at a time. Left hand, right hand, next rung.  Left hand, right hand, next rung.  I could hear cheering.  I could see Derek's face.  I'm pretty sure I shouted out "F@&$ Yeah" at the half way point.  Left hand, right hand, next rung.  Left hand, right hand, next rung.   One of them spun when I grabbed it, but I hung on.  In just moments,  I was on the platform, hugging Derek.  Exclaiming, that I had f@&$ing done it.   I couldn't even tell you what happened the next few miles, I was just that freakin' excited.


Gauntlet!!!
So, from looking at the photos, I can surmise that the Gauntlet was walking up what would normally be the half pipe during snowboarding season.   Of course, it seemed as though they were getting a jump start on the season and preparing the pipe as we hiked up it.  The snow guns were blasting!!!  There was one in particular that was being "manned" or should I say "boy-ed" by what looked like an eight year old.  He aimed for people who looked liked they weren't cold enough…or in some cases, who were taunting him back.  I'm sorry, but when it's me vs the boy with the snow gun, I'm gonna keep my mouth shut!

Log Jammin’ !!!
There was a bit of a wait for this one.  Enough time for me to untie my triple-knotted sneaker and remove what I thought was a rock.  There was no rock.  I figured out later in must have been a wade of dirt and hay crammed into my sock.   It was a useless endeavor that I was on because I couldn't keep my foot up off the ground long enough to get it back into my sneaker.  My foot hit the ground, picked up new dirt and crap; I wiped it off with my filthy hands and tried again and again until I finally just gave up.  At least it kept me occupied until it was our turn to go.  Time to climb the life-sized Lincoln Logs!!!  Oddly enough, they were a bit trickier than they looked.   I'm guessing this is where I acquired some of the scraps on my shins.

Berlin Walls #2!!!
#2, because climbing the first set was just so much fun!!!  The second set was probably 10 feet high, who knows, anything over my head may as well be 10 feet high.  We used the same strategy as the last set.  I definitely needed Derek to lower me down.  I was much more exhausted and the walls were that much higher, way too high to drop down from.  I always knew that having a super strong and tall husband who come it handy!!!

Fire Walk!!!
I'm so glad I still had my bandanna handy!  I used it to cover my mouth and nose while I ran through the smoke to our next obstacle.

Twinkle Toes!!!
A nice wobbly 3 inch beam across water that I'm pretty sure was cold.   Awesome, not!  I wasn't really feeling this one.  I have terrible balance.  People were falling left and right.  Others were making it across.  It really depended on who was in front of or behind you.  Their wobbles would lead to your wipe out!  I planned on leaving plenty of room in between me and the previous mudder, in this case, Kelly, but the staff kept urging us to go.  So, I went.  There was wobbling, I recovered and moved as quickly as I could.  That seemed to be the trick and before you knew it, I was on dry ground.

Everest!!!
The big, bad, quarter pipe known as Everest is a team effort for sure!  There was about an hour wait.  We were all freezing as the sun was getting lower in the sky.  I was lucky enough to have a foil wrap passed back to me, although, I couldn’t really tell if it was doing anything for me.   Finally, we were at the front of the pack.  Derek raced up first, grabbed the top and was helped up.  Aaron went next and now we had out "anchors".  I went next.  I ran straight up and jumped, hands grabbed my wrists and I pulled as they pulled.   I was on the platform.  I stayed to hold Derek and Aaron's legs down as they pulled up the rest of the team, who all made it up in one try!!!  We rock!!!  A big thanks to Derek and Aaron for pulling our butts up!.  I'm telling ya though, climbing down the back side was much scarier than running up the front.   The strapping was so far apart, I was afraid of falling through for sure, that damned height thing gets me every time!!!

Electro Shock Therapy!!!
Electro Shock Therapy, whatever you want to call it, I called it the FINISH LINE!!!  I sprinted right though.  If I was shocked, I didn't feel it!  The MC was there welcoming us across, headbands were placed, snacks a plenty, t-shirts from Under Armor and a beer of course from Dos Equis!!!  We, NO USE FOR A NAME, are TOUGH MUDDERS!!!!!!


This event was amazing!!!  There was a point during the course when I said to Tina, "We don't need to do this again…one and done."  I'm pretty sure that I also broke the Tough Mudder Oath when I said, "If we have to climb back up again, I'm done, that will be it, I quit."  That would definitely qualify as whining.  "Don't Whine, kids whine!"  I don't know what happened between those moments and the finish, but I know that even though I was freezing, I was still grinning.  And that night, we all said that we'd do it again and we've already recruited two more teammates!!!
Way to go Derek, Tina, Aaron, Rob, Ben and Kelly!!!  Can't wait to do it all over again!!!





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